The Path

August 28th 2009 – 2 days before my 41st birthday I had my 1st appointment with my RE. Dr. Doom, his partner Dr. Darth Vader and his assistant the Face Nurse.

September 2009 – I failed the Clomid Challenge miserably. Diagnosis Diminished Ovarian Reserve due to Advanced Maternal Age. Dr. Doom gave me a “Practically 0% chance of conceiving with my own eggs”. This really upset me because not only did my Diminished Ovarian Reserve destroy my dreams but also because I have never failed a test before in my life!

I started researching everything. I mean everything. I added battery supplements, changed my diet and started acupuncture.

October 2009 – A bump in the road. Literally, I had a polyp removed.

November 2009 – IUI #1 with Clomid 1 follie BFN

Still researching and joined the Fertile Thoughts Forum (my girls, my saviors!)

December 2009 – IUI #2 and IUI# 3 Clomid both 2 follies both BFN.

January 2009 – I had to sit out a cycle due to a cyst.

All the while I’ve been researching and discovered several studies stating that Clomid is not good for women over 35. I asked Dr. Doom to prescribe me injectables. He kept refusing, stating that my chances were next to zero. I insisted. He then said he would do it just to humor me. On that cycle, the cycle with injectables, I got pregnant.

February 2009 – IUI #4 2 follies BFP!!!! My miracle, my hope, my Angel.

At my 7 week ultrasound I was told by Dr. Doom’s partner Dr. Darth Vader that I would miscarry. There was no heartbeat. When I was asking him what I should do he told me that I should miscarry naturally and then said “Call us when you bleed”. I never called them. I never went back. A week and a half later I miscarried.

March 17th 2010 Saint Patrick’s Day – I miscarried my Angel.

March thru April 2010– Natural miscarriage. Bleed heavy for 4 weeks.

April 2010 – Started with my new RE Dr. Wow. I call him Dr. Wow! Because when I was leaving my consultation Dr. Wow said “I am going to do everything I can to get you pregnant.” It made me stop and say “Thank you”. I cried as I walked out. That is the first time anyone has said this to me since I started this journey. That is the first time I heard anyone say “try to get you pregnant” as opposed to “0% chance of getting pregnant” and I thought “Wow”!!

May/June 2010 – IVF #1 5 embryos none made it to a 5 day blast. No ET.

Sept/Oct 2010 – IVF #2 4 embryos 3 Day Transfer BFN

Oct/Nov 2010 – I decided on my Alternate Path if IVF #3 doesn’t work.

Dec 2010/Jan 2011 – IVF #3 BFN

Jan 2011 - March 2011 - Making some alterations to my Alternate Path.

May 2011 - Put my Alternate Path on the back burner and took what was behind Door #1 started mystery IVF #4

June/August 2011 - Mystery IVF #4 cancelled twice.

October 2011 - Completed mystery IVF #4 PREGNANT!! My Heart! My Soul!

November 2011 - Miscarried again! Devastated!

December 2011 to now - Finding a better place.

January 2012 - FET #1 transferred 3 embryos. BFN

March 2012 - FET #2 transferred 2 embryos BFN

March 2012 - Completed my homestudy for domestic infant adoption. I am officially an adoptive parent in waiting!!

May 2012 - FET #3 Casey's at bat. Another swing of Whiffer's bat! BFN!

June 2012 - WTF!

August 2012 IVF #5 DE BFN!

November 2012 FET #4 Chemical

March 2013 IUI #4 BFN

June 2013 IUI#5 BFN

September 2013 FET #5 Chemical

September 2009 to present day – Trying to keep my head above water. Trying to be okay!

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