What will I become?
I keep trying to feel nothing. Nothing at all.
If I feel nothing, nothing at all will I be able to avoid the pain, the pain if I fall?
As I try to feel nothing, nothing at all, my world closes in around me, I fall to the floor.
The emptiness that surrounds me, a giant gaping hole, as I sob and sob
I scream “I can’t cry anymore!”
“Please God I can’t cry anymore”
As I try to feel nothing, nothing at all there’s a flutter inside.
Could it be hope, is hope still alive?
I dream of what could be and all its possibilities.
For a moment I smile.
But what if it’s not meant to be?
As I try to feel nothing, nothing at all I can’t help but wonder “What’s going to become of me?”
*Note – I have never claimed to be a poet or even a writer for that matter. As I struggle with the question “What’s going to become of me?” these are the words that came to me. So I thought I would share.