Patience?
Second Verse Same as the First:
Yes, folks believe it or not it is still Groundhog Day for me!
I was given a large (and I mean LARGE) shot of PIO in hopes of inducing Leroy and getting rid of my cyst.
And it worked (sort of). Exactly 1 week later I got Leroy and I bet you can all figure out what happened next:
True to form and reliving the same day over and over...
I got my period. I started Lupron. I went for my baseline. And BOOM there’s cyst.
Well, it’s not a new cyst. It’s still the same cyst reeking havoc on my cycle.
And like a little kid I stomped and screamed:
“Why?? Why?? This isn’t fair!”
“I DON’T WANT TO WAIT ANYMORE!!”
Like the spoiled brat in Willy Wonka all I could think of was:
“And if I don't get the things I am after
I'm going to scream!...
And now
Don't care how
I want it now
Don't care how
I want it now”
And now, well now, I HAVE to learn patience once again.
Strength?
Just when I thought I was at my weakest. I was about to sit down and write a blog about how tough this is. How hard it is to wait! How difficult this journey has become! I saw this in my writings:
But this world is never stopping for me
But I will try and I will keep on trying
I set my goals there's no denying
Never stop fighting
For What I believe
~ Amy MacDonald
And I knew that I had copied and pasted those lyrics at the beginning of my journey as a reminder to keep fighting.
To never lose my strength.
And now I HAVE to find my strength again.
Resilience?
And above all when you are fighting for your dream you must be resilient.
You will be knocked down.
You will get up.
Resilience.
You will have set backs.
You will move forward.
Resilience.
You will fail.
And you will succeed.
Resilience.
And now, I MUST be resilient.
I am working on being patient, finding my strength and being resilient. These are lesson that I hope are finally learned.
I'm still new to the whole TTC game, but what happens if you decide to ignore the cyst, and continue thru with your plan for this cycle?
ReplyDeleteDamm...I hate that cyst.
ReplyDeleteBut I love your attitude.
Wish I could mainline some of that!
These lessons are getting old (speaking for myself!) and so is the cyst situation. I'm sorry you're benched and share your frustration. I like your attitude though and loved the quote. Hang in there and "...never stop fighting".
ReplyDeleteF'ing cyst! Resiliency and fortitude are definitely needed when dealing with IF. You've got them both.
ReplyDeleteI have had 3 cancelled cycles do to cysts. I am at a lost. I hope your cyst magically disappears. Mine did when they were about to do surgery but wouldn't you know it the left ovary decided it wanted to get a cyst. UHG I feel your frustration.
ReplyDelete